You are sitting on the couch having a discussion with your mate, parent or maybe a good friend.
The conversation starts well but it gets a little heated as you go along.
The more you talk the angrier you both become then all of a sudden they say something very hurtful to you.
How could they say that? Don’t they realize how deeply that hurt you?
It seems as if they really don’t care doesn’t it?
As you think about it you wonder where this came from?
he realized that your mate your parent or your close friend loves you… or so you thought.
Let’s consider the same scenario that we just read except it was you who said something hurtful to the one you love or really cared about.
The old saying “you are hurt most by the ones that you love the most” but where did that anger come from?
How could your loved one or friend have said something like that?
Hurt people hurt people
In my many years of practice I have dealt with this situation countless times.
The person who could say something like that to you with such pain is the one who has been hurt themselves.
I realize this in my own family as I was growing up.
I couldn’t figure out why some of my family members said the things that they did.
It really hurt but as I got older and I began my practice over 20 years ago I drew a conclusion.
Rejection will follow an individual their entire life if they do not deal with it.
This pain of rejection will come out one way or the other.
It will come out with angry words, it may come out in other ways.
The fact is, a person who would hurt you is a person who is hurt themselves.
I realized that this may not stop the pain that you feel but it can explain why the other person responded the way they did.
People process pain of rejection differently.
The interesting part about all of this is that a person will process the pain of rejection and the anger that it causes differently.
Five distinct temperaments… A myriad of different responses
It would take me many many years to explain how all the different temperaments in the various blends work
We must realize that there is a lot of pain out there and no one person is immune to the pain of rejection..
The next time you feel that sting of rejection from a close friend or a loved one,
understand that the person who is angry and yelling at you is a person who is hurt themselves and simply
does not know how to deal with it.
The pain of rejection can become overwhelming and control your life.
contact us today and let’s get started on the path to healing and happiness.